If you’ve ever dreamed of paying way too much for a truly subpar experience, then boy, do I have the place for you. It’s like they took every overpriced, underwhelming tourist trap and perfected it. Let’s talk about the room. It’s got that authentic Nepali charm if by authentic, you mean mildew and musty. The bed was harder than a rock (and probably just as comfortable), the sheets were stained and had a charming shade of yellow, and the bathroom? Well, if you like the scent of mold and the thrill of never knowing if you’ll have hot water, you’ll be in heaven. But don’t worry, they’re charging premium rates for this one-of-a-kind experience. Now, the food. I didn’t realize a plate of bland rice and boiled vegetables could cost as much as an average meal in a decent restaurant back home. But sure, why not pay triple for food that tastes like it was cooked by a group of very disinterested people who’ve completely given up on flavor? I’m convinced that the kitchen staff believes spice is something you only read about in books. And let’s not forget the absolute genius business model they have going on. It’s impressive, really charge way too much for everything! Need a towel? Prepare for a small surcharge. Want to do an activity? Oh, they’ll be happy to charge you for that too, even though it’s about as authentic as a theme park ride. I’ve had cheaper experiences in European capitals, and that’s saying something. They seem to think ”village experience” means overcharging for the privilege of being completely underwhelmed. But the best part? The staff or as I like to call them, the magical invisible people. You’ll get all the attention of a forgotten sock in the laundry. Need something? Good luck, because they’re either completely absent or so disinterested that you’ll wonder if they’ve been trained by the art of indifference. So, if you’re looking for a truly authentic experience where you pay three times more than you should for mediocrity, this is your place! Otherwise, save your money and go somewhere where they actually respect your time, your wallet, and, you know, provide the kind of experience they’re charging you for. Trust me, you’ll thank me later.
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